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Of Reproduction and Related Matters
Apr. 9th, 2008 10:18 amOver the weekend (Sunday in fact, in one of the local cafes which I prefer because of the way they make their chai) I got talking to a couple, whom I shall call A and H.
I met them through![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
paula_angela, although it turns out H at least knows a lot of people I know through the ALP.
A and H want to have kids, they have only one problem... They have two wombs and none of that other stuff required to make a baby! Hence they put out the call for... Men!
So we had a terribly interesting chat. I've talked about this stuff before, although not seriously, with at least two sets of lesbian friends. It's faaaaaar more complicated than it might first appear. So many things need to be sorted out, such as:
How much contact/involvement does the third party have? Is it just a donation and nothing further? Or does one work out an arrangement up to and including co-parenting? How does this stuff end up impacting on my relationships and (later) decisions to reproduce? If I end up through various circumstances being responsible for the child(ren) in question, that would make having kids of my own complicated. This is before one gets into the legal implications - in this heterosexually biased world, the biological father is technically responsible for the child they produce, no matter the exact circumstances of its conception, or even if it already has two mommies.
A and H have been together for a long time, which is encouraging. And they've really thought about this stuff. What they want to do is form a relationship of sorts with someone (possibly me!) over a period of months or so, before anything happens. It's a bit like going on a series of dates at some level, they have to like me before they'd think about wanting to... Er, I wonder what the polite term is here? Before they decide to chose me...
Will have to introduce them to Deb as well, make sure we all get along.
I met them through
paula_angela, although it turns out H at least knows a lot of people I know through the ALP. A and H want to have kids, they have only one problem... They have two wombs and none of that other stuff required to make a baby! Hence they put out the call for... Men!
So we had a terribly interesting chat. I've talked about this stuff before, although not seriously, with at least two sets of lesbian friends. It's faaaaaar more complicated than it might first appear. So many things need to be sorted out, such as:
How much contact/involvement does the third party have? Is it just a donation and nothing further? Or does one work out an arrangement up to and including co-parenting? How does this stuff end up impacting on my relationships and (later) decisions to reproduce? If I end up through various circumstances being responsible for the child(ren) in question, that would make having kids of my own complicated. This is before one gets into the legal implications - in this heterosexually biased world, the biological father is technically responsible for the child they produce, no matter the exact circumstances of its conception, or even if it already has two mommies.
A and H have been together for a long time, which is encouraging. And they've really thought about this stuff. What they want to do is form a relationship of sorts with someone (possibly me!) over a period of months or so, before anything happens. It's a bit like going on a series of dates at some level, they have to like me before they'd think about wanting to... Er, I wonder what the polite term is here? Before they decide to chose me...
Will have to introduce them to Deb as well, make sure we all get along.
Three Cafes and Lesbians on a Bike
Jan. 26th, 2008 11:01 pmToday. Looked at some houses. Found a rather ace two bedroom place in the far north of Brunswick. It was the first place that we got excited about in a while. Barbara and I were like "we could put our books there, and we could get a couch that turns into a bed and I could put my desk on the landing and and and..." So we're going to apply.
Then I made it to the first of the day's Cafes. The Tin Pot. I <3 that place. We made it to the last of the houses we were looking at. Well, the flat. Well, the... what the fuck is it? Supposedly two bedrooms, it was on three levels. None of the rooms had doors on them. The downstairs "bedroom" was being used as a office. The middle level bedroom was more or less next to the front door. The "living room" and "kitchen" were on the top level, and boy were they tiny. I still can't believe the kinds of shit places that not only exist but people are expected to live in them! Damn!
Next, I met some friends in the city. Carla and Anastasia, the couple who I didn't realise had broken up ages ago! Eep. Ah well, they're still friends, seems even Barbara (the once and future housemate) knew they'd split! Damn, talk about out of the loop... We met at the Degraves Cafe and I chain drank Chai's and Mineral Waters - it's been hot... :-)
It was interesting see the Girls again. We sort of lost touch after a certain Breakup, so I haven't seen them in person in about three years. I tried to find out what had been happening with them in the mean time, but they couldn't really think of anything... Not that I could! Then it emerged that a couple I'd known back in the day had had a baby late last year... You'd think that might count as something interesting!!!
Then they blasted off on Anastasia's motor cycle:
Which was apparently something impressive, all I noted was the flames painted on the sides!
And tonight I could have gone to see some bands at the Corner (Blood Duster and Fuck! I'm Dead! amoungst others) or headed off to the drive in in Coburg with some friends in bikes... But I couldn't be arsed, so I headed off to ANOTHER cafe with my laptop... :-)
Then I came home and chatted with some folks. Hellojedi_amara :-P
Then I made it to the first of the day's Cafes. The Tin Pot. I <3 that place. We made it to the last of the houses we were looking at. Well, the flat. Well, the... what the fuck is it? Supposedly two bedrooms, it was on three levels. None of the rooms had doors on them. The downstairs "bedroom" was being used as a office. The middle level bedroom was more or less next to the front door. The "living room" and "kitchen" were on the top level, and boy were they tiny. I still can't believe the kinds of shit places that not only exist but people are expected to live in them! Damn!
Next, I met some friends in the city. Carla and Anastasia, the couple who I didn't realise had broken up ages ago! Eep. Ah well, they're still friends, seems even Barbara (the once and future housemate) knew they'd split! Damn, talk about out of the loop... We met at the Degraves Cafe and I chain drank Chai's and Mineral Waters - it's been hot... :-)
It was interesting see the Girls again. We sort of lost touch after a certain Breakup, so I haven't seen them in person in about three years. I tried to find out what had been happening with them in the mean time, but they couldn't really think of anything... Not that I could! Then it emerged that a couple I'd known back in the day had had a baby late last year... You'd think that might count as something interesting!!!
Then they blasted off on Anastasia's motor cycle:
Which was apparently something impressive, all I noted was the flames painted on the sides!
And tonight I could have gone to see some bands at the Corner (Blood Duster and Fuck! I'm Dead! amoungst others) or headed off to the drive in in Coburg with some friends in bikes... But I couldn't be arsed, so I headed off to ANOTHER cafe with my laptop... :-)
Then I came home and chatted with some folks. Hello
jedi_amara :-P
Hmmm.... Is This A Faux Pas?
Jan. 21st, 2008 08:36 pmIt that how you spell Faux Pas???
Who recons the following was... One of them things...
One of the delights of f*c*b**k is finding old friends. I came across a couple (literally, a couple) of people I hadn't seen in about three years (they were friends of the Ex.)
So I thought I'd ask them out for a coffee, let bygones be bygones. So I asked 'em out for a coffee. There was a bit of an exchange of messages on the aforementioned social networking site - which hence was doing its job. And one of them mentioned they were at two addresses...
Wait, I thought, when I knew them they lived together in a flat in St. Kilda... So I asked... Seems they're not together and haven't been for ages!
*slaps head*
In my defence, neither of them display their relationship status, and there was a series of happy pictures of them recently from Midsumma... With, I now realise, at least one other chick in the shot... (er, important detail which may be lacking, partly because I don't want to use their names: we're talking a lesbian couple here...)
They were practically married! In fact they did some kind of "commitment ceremony" on a beach as a protest about rights for same sex couples.
Ah well, will try and meet at least one of them for a drink!!??!?
Who recons the following was... One of them things...
One of the delights of f*c*b**k is finding old friends. I came across a couple (literally, a couple) of people I hadn't seen in about three years (they were friends of the Ex.)
So I thought I'd ask them out for a coffee, let bygones be bygones. So I asked 'em out for a coffee. There was a bit of an exchange of messages on the aforementioned social networking site - which hence was doing its job. And one of them mentioned they were at two addresses...
Wait, I thought, when I knew them they lived together in a flat in St. Kilda... So I asked... Seems they're not together and haven't been for ages!
*slaps head*
In my defence, neither of them display their relationship status, and there was a series of happy pictures of them recently from Midsumma... With, I now realise, at least one other chick in the shot... (er, important detail which may be lacking, partly because I don't want to use their names: we're talking a lesbian couple here...)
They were practically married! In fact they did some kind of "commitment ceremony" on a beach as a protest about rights for same sex couples.
Ah well, will try and meet at least one of them for a drink!!??!?
