Send My Conscience Home in a Taxi

Marvin, my cat, made me laugh and laugh today.

He had to go the the vet for a minor procedure, clearing a blocked tear duct. So I had to leave him there all day. And because he was going to be given an anaesthetic, he wasn't allowed any breakfast. About which he was not happy.

Some background. I'm not Marvin's original owner. I've had him about three and a half years of his ten and a half years. He's very big for a generic domestic short hair, 5.5 kilos, which is bigger than some terriers. So he has big teeth and big claws to go with his muscular bulk. Most of the time he's fine, but even a playful bite from him will draw blood! And when he really doesn't like something, he turns into a whirling mass of sharp ends.

Here's a video of him being "playful":


This is the cat that stalks dogs. Far from running away, he'll stalk across a garden or try and claw his way through a wire door to attack a dog. This is the cat who once wandered into a neighbour's apartment and ate her goldfish. This is the cat that took a vet and a nurse to take his temperature, the whole time screeching at a high pitch that got higher when the thermometer was inserted!

On the plus side, I'm never worried about him, he had road sense and is clearly perfectly capable of looking after himself.

Anyway, I dropped him off a the vet this morning. They asked if he was on any medication, I said no, but that they should watch out for his temper!

This was good advice.

Apparently they couldn't hold him down to give him an anaesthetic, so they had to pop him into something they called a "gas box"! When I turned up, they asked what he was like with me because "he's been hissing and swiping at us from his cage all day". They were reluctant to approach him, so got me to put him back in his box. As soon as I entered the room, he started meowing plaintively. The staff looked at him, then and me, and said "this is the quietest he's been all day..."

I opened the cage and plucked him out. He started purring loudly! The staff were astonished. I turned around to pop him back in his carry cage, and he caught sight of one of the vet nurses. And started hissing loudly and swiping the air at the same time as purring! Strange cat. I struggled a bit to get him in the box, but I think he realised I was getting him out of there and calmed down.

The Northcote Plaza Veterinary Clinic won't be forgetting his visit for a while!

I should say, he's no more insane than your average cat. Most of the time he's quite affectionate. He didn't have a difficult kittenhood, although apparently he was a manic kitten. It's just his personality, sometimes friendly, sometimes face-rippingly angry! Er, yes, and he may also have made himself unwelcome at several houses where he's gone to stay while we've been on holiday. Anyone want to mind a cat? :-)